Vanity Fair’s collection of poignant Hitch photos offers a great tribute to my most favorite contrarian…

http://www.vanityfair.com/culture/features/2011/12/christopher-hitchens-slideshow-201112#slide=1

Yes, I mean in academic and practical capacity: over the long-term, can humor help relationships?  Are there certain types of humor that benefit one spouse over the other?  
Philosophy, caricature, exaggeration, comedy-mirrors-reality – does humor help and how do we measure it?

This was brought to mind when I came across this study from Europe’s Journal of Psychology: Bad Humor, Bad Marriage: Humor Styles in Divorced and Married Couples

Is humor, as often believed, an important ingredient for quality in romantic relationships, especially among married couples? Previous research has investigated this question but often done so treating humor as a global trait without distinguishing between different humor styles. More intriguing: do specific humor styles contribute to marital stability and, consequently – by their absence or because of their quality – to relationship dissolution and divorce?

By its very nature, humor introduces something unique to human interactions that may contribute to, or even change, more stable emotional states.  Positive humor styles may stabilize marriage (e.g., by reducing tension or by communicating warm feelings) in the presence of disagreement, conflict, or relational insecurity, while negative humor styles may destabilize marriage (e.g., by introducing tension or by communicating criticism) even in the presence of secure attachment, agreement, and harmony.

Some fascinating findings from the study:

• In stable long-term relationships, self-enhancement humor can thus be an efficient tool for increasing relationship satisfaction.
• Women’s self-defeating humor seemed to contribute to men’s, but not women’s, marital satisfaction. This unexpected result, if not due to chance, could be interpreted as an indication of a traditional gender asymmetry in marriage. Women’s self-ridiculization through humor may please husbands and increase their marital satisfaction. This can be facilitated by the fact that self-defeating humor does not explicitly attest asymmetry: “it was only a joke”.
• Men and women, especially in married couples, seemed to agree, consistently across judgments of self and the spouse, that men use humor – all styles except self-defeating – more than women.
• In other words, spouses may differ on the use of general/social humor, but they are similar on the high or low use of humor styles that reflect respect or transgression of interpersonal and social values and norms such as aggressive and earthy humor.
• Another issue that arises from the present findings is that both partners’ humor styles seem to have an impact on marital insatisfaction and dissolution, but, in several cases, this was in a way that paralleled gender differences on personality. Men are typically found to be less agreeable and more aggressive, whereas women more neurotic (Lippa, in press). It may then be that, to some point, the problem for marital satisfaction and stability comes from men’s excessive use of “masculine” humor (aggressive and earthy) and women’s excessive use of “feminine” humor (self-defeating).

Regardless of humor’s effects on marital stability or dissolution, though, this study closes with a reminder that the choice between maintaining a relationship or letting it collapse does come down to individual choice and/or ethical judgment.   So, from the Kramdens to the Lockharts to the Simpsons and the couples in these two sketches - one British, from the TV skit comedy Bruiser, the other French, from the sketch play “Ils S’Aiment!” – what priority should humor have in a relationship?  LMK your thoughts!

Which Social Sites are Best for Which Marketing Outcomes?

This is an especially critical point for corporate clients; it’s a timely cue to extend corporate vigilance to the big picture of protecting volume data. As data mining tools and algorithms gain in sophistication — and competitors have greater economic incentive to profit from information insights,  volume and proliferation no longer offer secure cover against IT researchers and data analysts.  Profitability, competitive advantage and communication regarding strategies and activities…all are now vulnerable to exposure even in bulk data packages.

What are your thoughts? Please read the original article and feel free to share back your comments on the accuracy/inaccuracy of their assessment. You can read the original article here: http://blogs.hbr.org/cs/2010/12/could_wikileaks_expose_your_co.html

Edelman:  Pioneer Thinking, Ethical Business Practices, Global Presence and Proud Employees! Congratulations!!

From the Book Written by:

Do

• Create a complete profile on each site. Make yourself appealing online. Make sure that your professional image on these business networking sites isn’t tarnished by radically different portrayals of your personality on some of the personal networking sites. Consistency in your profile, site to site, is also important, so ensure the same level of detail and quality regardless of the site it’s on. If you can’t keep your profile up-to-date on multiple sites, it’s better to stick with just one site (or just one personal and one professional).
• Grow your network. Whether you subscribe to the “bigger is better” theory or are more comfortable with the “close and personal” strategies for growing your network, you need a reasonable number of connections to make good things happen. How you define reasonable depends on your field and your needs, but for many people, a reasonable size of an online network might be at least 50 to 150 people.
• Facilitate introductions. As part of a large online network, you should help other people connect. You can recommend them if you know them and are comfortable doing so. Or just say “for your consideration” if you don’t know them well. The old theory about “my reputation is on the line” when making introductions is, in our opinion, just that—old! Networking introductions are much more fluid online.
• Remember your manners. Treat people virtually as you would in face-to-face gatherings—kindly and with respect. Don’t wear out your welcome or bombard them with repeated requests for introductions to others. They are likely to drop you from their networks.

Don’t

• Be selfish. Remember that networking is a two-way street. You need to give as well as you get, help other people, and not just be looking selfishly at how you can benefit from the interaction
• Have unrealistic expectations. Don’t expect something good from every connection. Just as in live networking settings, not every contact is a helpful contact. But even if you don’t see yourself doing business with someone, you never know whom that person might know or how you might provide assistance to him or her or one of that person’s contacts in the future
• Try to accomplish too much too fast. Build rapport first. Just as you wouldn’t walk up to someone at an initial meeting and immediately ask for favors, introductions, jobs, or business deals, you shouldn’t do that online, either. Wait until the person knows you and has some investment in helping you connect, likely in a second or third conversation or exchange
• Spend all your time online and ignore offline networking strategies. Both are important, and the need to meet people face-to-face or by phone.

Excerpt from Find a Job Through Social Networking: Use LinkedIn, Twitter, Facebook, Blogs, and More to Advance Your Career (© JIST Publishing) by Diane Crompton and Ellen Sautter.

CONGRATULATIONS, ELLEN and Diane: I am SOOO proud of you both and your book!!!!

By the way, Marian Salpeter has already reviewed and praised your book in her column yesterday on The Examiner:

In today’s world of work, social media savvy is a must—no matter your age, employment status, education level, occupation or industry. Career management consultants Diane Crompton and Ellen Sautter deliver the guidance needed to achieve this essential know-how in their recently released book Find a Job Through Social Networking, Second Edition.

Throughout this guide, Crompton and Sautter reveal how to avoid the pitfalls associated with social networking and discuss how to create and implement a plan for getting the most from LinkedIn, Twitter, Facebook, blogs and other popular sites and online tools. Specifically, they offer actionable advice for:

• Sharing your expertise and learning from others in your field.
• Building your credibility through online publishing and speaking.
• Connecting with industry insiders across the country and the world.
• Optimizing social network searches to research potential employers or clients.
• Infusing your personal brand into all your online efforts.
• Presenting your accomplishments in professional profiles.
• And much more.

To read the rest of her article, click here:

New book explains power of social networking for career and job search success

Ellen Sautter has provided career transition support to tens of thousands of clients of all backgrounds including professionals and executives. She is a Senior Career Management Consultant with Right Management and has nearly 20 years experience as a career coach in the career-transition industry.

Diane Crompton brings more than 15 years experience in career-transition services, recruiting, education, and consulting. She has coached professionals at all levels from a wide range of functional and industry backgrounds and with varying career objectives, including self-employment.

Now….can I have an autographed copy, please?

Former students of mine from Sulzer Turbo AG in Zurich will remember my particular passion for this subject in the  Pre-Int Courses (Murphys Blue Book) : Hans Baumgartner, Daniela Ferrari,  Hansueli Bruderer, Helen Ronner, Heinz Zehnder, to name but a few – you and so many of your colleagues were wonderful and patient students in this subject!!

So I was thrilled to find Grammar Girl’s explanation on this subject – it’s precise and tightly explained in the matter of Active vs. Passive Voice and I would like to share it with the rest of the students, US, Europe, Far East and beyond!

Active Voice Versus Passive Voice

Episode 232: July 22, 2010

by Mignon Fogarty

Today’s topic is active voice versus passive voice.

The podcast edition of this article was sponsored by GoToMeeting. With this meeting service, you can hold your meetings over the Internet and give presentations, product demos and training sessions right from your PC. For a free, 45 day trial, visit GoToMeeting.com/podcast.

Here’s a question from Brian in Iowa. He writes, “It drives me crazy when people write in passive voice. How can I teach people how to tell the difference between passive and active voice and to stay away from passive voice?”

Well, Brian is right, the first step is to help people understand the difference between active and passive voice, because many people believe they should avoid the passive voice, but fewer people can define it or recognize it.

What Is Active Voice?

I’ll start with active voice because it’s simpler. In an active sentence, the subject is doing the action. A straightforward example is the sentence “Steve loves Amy.” Steve is the subject, and he is doing the action: he loves Amy, the object of the sentence.

Another example is the title of the Marvin Gaye song “I Heard It through the Grapevine.” “I” is the subject, the one who is doing the action. “I” is hearing “it,” the object of the sentence.

What Is Passive Voice?

In passive voice, the target of the action gets promoted to the subject position. Instead of saying, “Steve loves Amy,” I would say, “Amy is loved by Steve.” The subject of the sentence becomes Amy, but she isn’t doing anything. Rather, she is just the recipient of Steve’s love. The focus of the sentence has changed from Steve to Amy.

If you wanted to make the title of the Marvin Gaye song passive, you would say “It was heard by me through the grapevine,” not such a catchy title anymore.

Is “To Be” a Sign of a Passive Sentence?

A lot of people think all sentences that contain a form of the verb “to be” are in passive voice, but that isn’t true. For example, the sentence “I am holding a pen” is in active voice, but it uses the verb “am,” which is a form of “to be.” The passive form of that sentence is “The pen is being held by me.”

Notice that the subject, the pen, isn’t doing anything in that sentence. It’s not taking an action; it’s passive. One clue that your sentence is passive is that the subject isn’t taking a direct action.

Is Passive Voice Always Wrong?

Another important point is that passive sentences aren’t incorrect; it’s just that they often aren’t the best way to phrase your thoughts. Sometimes passive voice is awkward and other times it’s vague. Also, passive voice is usually wordy, so you can tighten your writing if you replace passive sentences with active sentence.

When you put sentences in passive voice, it’s easy to leave out the person or thing doing the action. For example, “Amy is loved,” is passive. The problem with that sentence is that you don’t know who loves Amy.

Politicians often use passive voice to intentionally obscure the idea of who is taking the action. Ronald Reagan famously said, “Mistakes were made,” when referring to the Iran-Contra scandal. Other examples of passive voice for political reasons could include “Bombs were dropped,” and “Shots were fired.” Pay attention to the news and listen for examples of passive voice.

Also, a reader named Matthew commented that businesses sometimes use passive voice. He notes that it sounds better to write, “Your electricity will be shut off,” than “We, the electric company, will be shutting off your power.”

Is Passive Voice Hard to Understand?

A recent study suggests that less educated people–those who dropped out of school when they were 16–have a harder time understanding sentences written in the passive voice than those written in active voice. I only had access to the press release, not the original study, but the results made it seem as if you should stick with active voice if you’re writing for the general population.

Is Passive Voice OK in Crime Reports?

On the other hand, sometimes passive voice does have advantages. For example, if you truly don’t know who is taking the action, then you can’t name the person. This is especially common with crime reports. For example, a security guard might write “The store was robbed,” because nobody knows who the robber was.

Can Passive Voice Work in Fiction Writing?

Passive voice is also sometimes useful in fiction writing. For example, if you were writing a mystery novel and you wanted to highlight missing cookies because they are central to the story, passive voice is the best option. It would make more sense to write, “The cookies were stolen,” instead of “Somebody stole the cookies.”

The difference is subtle, but in the passive sentence “The cookies were stolen,” the focus is on the cookies. In “Somebody stole the cookies,” the focus would be on the unknown somebody.

Passive voice can be helpful if you want to create a sense of mystery in your sentence, which is also a reason that it’s not usually a good choice when you’re writing nonfiction and you want your writing to be clear.

Why Is Passive Voice Recommended for Science Writing?

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An exception is that scientists are often encouraged to write in passive voice to lend their writing a sense of objectivity–to take themselves and their actions and opinions out of the experimental results. I used to be a scientist and I always found that odd. It felt as if we were trying to hide that real people did the experiments.

Some scientific style guides do allow for a limited use of active voice (1). For example, it may be OK to write, “We sequenced the DNA,” instead of “The DNA was sequenced,” but it’s still considered bad for scientists to insert themselves into conclusions. For example, it would be bad scientific form to write “We believe the mutation causes cancer.” But you still don’t need passive voice to achieve your goals. For example, the active sentence “We believe the mutation causes cancer,” could be changed to “The data suggests that the mutation causes cancer.” That’s still active, but it eliminates the sense of subjectivity.

Did Strunk & White Get Passive Voice Wrong?

Finally, I have to include a note about Strunk & White’s treatment of passive voice. In their classic book, The Elements of Style, three of their four examples of passive voice aren’t actually passive voice sentences. I’ve included two links below that explain the problems, but if you rely on The Elements of Style, as so many people do, be aware that this is a problem with that book.

50 Years of Stupid Grammar Advice (The Chronicle of Higher Education)
English Passive Voice (Wikipedia)

Web Bonus: Watson & Crick

Watson and Crick’s famous paper about the discovery of the structure of DNA, written in 1953, contains both active and passive sentences;

We wish to suggest a structure for the salt of deoxyribose nucleic acid (D.N.A.). (active)

We have made the usual chemical assumptions, namely, that each chain consists of phosphate diester groups joining beta-D-deoxyribofuranose residues with 3′,5′ linkages. (active)

If it is assumed that the bases only occur in the structure in the most plausible tautomeric forms (that is, with the keto rather than the enol configurations) it is found that only specific pairs of bases can bond together. (passive)

It has been found experimentally that the ratio of the amounts of adenine to thymine, and the ratio of guanine to cytosine, are always very close to unity for deoxyribose nucleic acid. (passive)

References

1. “Writing in the Sciences,” The Writing Center, University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill, http://www.unc.edu/depts/wcweb/handouts/sciences.html (accessed July 23, 2010)